On Vacation From People Like Me


Let me first throw a quick shout out to the lovely city of Philadelphia. If you are a foodie, this lovely city is a must stop. South Phili, my old stomping grounds, is filled with bars, taverns and hole in the wall type places with amazing, locally featured dishes and tap lists that do not include the mass produced domestics we are all unfortunately accustomed to. If you ever have a lay over in the City of Brotherly Love, extend it a bit longer and set your hunger goals on something beyond the stereotypical Yuengling and cheesesteak.

Okay, now down to the fact that I have turned into a monster. Well, maybe I have always been a monster and it just took the craziest summer of my adult life to bring it out of me.  For the past month and a half I have excused myself from the service industry, in a cheap remedy to cool the jets. What I discovered during this time is that I am a hypocritical asshole. Last weekend I was enjoying the company of college friends along the East Coast. During our pillaging of small local establishments, food trucks and college parties, I found that I was getting some strange looks from my colleagues.

“If you are ordering off the menu again, I am going to smack you.”

The quote above was a stern but fair statement delivered by my dearest friend during our most recent dining experience. My request was small. I asked to have my chicken breaded instead of grilled for a chicken Italiano sandwhich. NBD…right?

WRONG! Who was I, the crusader against menu modification to get on the tallest soap box in the world and demand something of such nature? I wanted to smack myself. I thoroughly apologized to my waitress, and she knew I was genuine. There was plenty of secondhand embarrassment for the table of eight to go around.

Thankfully, after much banter and constant belittling from some of the people I hold the most dear, I have come to the realization: It is better to give than to receive. After getting a taste of my own medicine, I might be more inclined to be that liaison between our customers and my kitchen and becoming a modification specialist. Have I turned a new leaf? Possibly yes. I will give it a shot. But let’s be honest, if I do, it won’t last too long.

I am wishing everyone a Happy 2014!


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